Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Who Is That Faceless Man?

What would life be like apart from facebook?
Facebook has been a huge part of my life over the last 3 years. I am glad that facebook does not publicize how much time exactly I have spent on there since my facebook "beginning." I think I might cry. Or perhaps throw my computer into Lake Superior. I don't know.

I remember being so excited to finally have it.
My college didn't have student email addresses. So for a long time I was not able to get it. But in the summer/fall of 2006 all of that changed.
And I was overjoyed. Ecstatic. Now I could be one of the cool "college twentysomethings" that were creating a life on facebook.
At my peak, I had over 600 friends.
Almost 40 photo albums were published.
600 pictures with my face tagged.
Top friends.
Bumper stickers.
I was cool.

"Too much of a good thing is... bad."
And how true that is?! I recently tried to put just a little more water into my bus' water tank. SPLASH! Bad idea. The hose and jug got backed up and water went everywhere. I learned right then and there that "too much of a good thing is... bad."
The same goes for facebook -- and anything on the internet.
I got sucked and duped into the world of "staying connected."
Like for many people, facebook was a second home for me. Whenever I felt alone or like I just needed a friend, there was facebook.
This created so many other problems for me. Depression. Frustration. Real loneliness.
Oh, how many late nights I spent wishing someone would get on to talk to.
How I would think about facebook all day long. Wondering what my friends were upto.
Looking at all the photos of fun that people were involved in and wishing I was included. Commenting on those photos just to let people know I was there.
Making groups to see how many people I could round up -- then staking my existence on the success of the group. I remember how excited I was when one of my groups -- Yeah! I'm A Hopeless Romantic -- reached 5000 people. I am a success. People love me. Yea!

Facebook is too easy.
Connection with people we care about shouldn't be this easy.
We should have to work.

So I am about to try again.
To try again to live life without facebook.
I wonder what it will be like?

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